Wednesday, February 23, 2011

The wisdom of Kung-fu Panda


Well actually, it’s the wisdom of Master Oogway from Kung-fu Panda that I am referring to. The quote, to be specific is “Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery, today is a gift, that’s why they call it the present”. In my mind, one of the greatest quotes I’ve ever heard.  Why? Let me tell you…

How many of us live in the present? You may think you do, just as I do, but in reality, we are more often than not somewhere else. Whether it’s thinking (again the thinking brain takes control – see past blogs for reference!) about what happened yesterday, what we need to do later today and what needs to be organised for tomorrow. Am I right? Go on, admit it! How often are we truly present, right here, right now, in this very moment? Sadly, for me, not often enough. That’s why I love this quote, beautifully articulated by Master Oogway (the wily old turtle for those of you unfamiliar with the genius of Kung-fu Panda).

What’s so fascinating about this concept of living not in the present, but in the past or the future via our mind, is that we aren’t really living in reality. Because what is not present right now is no longer or not yet real. We can create whole stories in our heads about something that has not yet even occurred and may never in fact occur, and have you noticed that we more often than not think about what might go wrong, rather than what we’d really like to happen?

This is where worrying comes in to play – we feel stressed about a certain situation – for example having enough money (or more accurately, not having enough money). I’ve found this to be quite a relevant topic for new mums because suddenly you are down to living on one income, which is a challenge at the best of times, but even harder when you’ve got a new bub and all the expenses that come with those precious bundles of joy. So we worry about how we’ll make ends meet and in doing that, imagine a whole array of scenarios that may or may not become reality. And our mind is so powerful in creating these scenes in our head that they feel real to us and we feel real emotions around them. Yet what we are worrying about is NOT REAL in this very moment! Ok confused much? I know, it’s crazy. So crazy that it hardly even makes sense when you try to make sense of it!

So to save myself from going crazy (or crazier), I repeat that quote to myself as often as I can, with particular emphasis on the last line – “today is a gift, that’s why they call it the present”. I love this line because not only does it remind me to live in the here and the now – which I believe is one of the greatest gifts I can give my daughter for free, to be available and focused on her as much as I can be – but this quote also reminds me to be grateful for each and every day. And that is a very powerful thing – to be truly grateful for every moment that we have, to feel blessed for the many wonderful things that are part of your life and to say thank you. Being grateful can change your whole life, it is that empowering, because suddenly you can feel happiness for the smallest things – a morning cup of tea, a quiet cuddle with your bub, a quick kiss shared with your partner – even amidst the most chaotic of days.

And sharing your happiness, in this very moment, with those that you love is surely a wonderful gift to give.

 A little kiss with my baby girl fills me with happiness... awwww

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Mother's Intuition


I’ve always struggled to trust my intuition. I’d get a strong feeling about something, have a vivid dream or even a knee jerk reaction in response to something, yet I’d still doubt myself. Because inevitably, my mind (that is the thinking part of the brain, rather than the feeling part) would pipe up and refute these feelings with the sole intention of casting doubt. This is what the mind does – it creates havoc when you let it run your life!

A perfect example of this occurred about a month back when we had a number of wild storms here on the coast. This one particular afternoon, a storm was raging outside – wind howling, rain pouring and thunder and lightning creating a spectacular scene outside. During this storm it came to Lilybelle’s nap time. I went into her room to put her down and I got the strongest feeling that NO, it’s not safe here and to bring her out to the living room for her nap so I can see her. So I turned around and walked back into the living room and it was here that the inevitable doubt struck. “Don’t be silly” are the words I hear in my mind as I stood undecided in the living room, “you’re being an over-protective mum. She’s perfectly safe.” I stalled and then let the doubt win and turned back to put her down in her bed. Just as I was laying her down, two big branches came crashing down onto the window, right beside her bed!

So I nearly jump out of my skin! Luckily I was still holding on to her and I raced back out of the room. Thankfully no serious damage was done and both Lilybelle and I were safe. But boy was it a big lesson for me. At that moment I promised myself that I would ALWAYS trust my intuition in future, no matter how much doubt creeps in. What’s interesting is that this sense of intuition has become so much stronger since I’ve become a mum and again so since I made that promise to trust my instincts.

Of course ‘mother’s intuition’ is not a new concept, however I do find it interesting that so little emphasis is put on how important it is and what an amazing tool it is for mothering.  What I mean by this is that new mums are inundated with advice from everyone and anyone, from your next door neighbour to qualified health professionals, to books and magazines. Yet how often do we listen to what our instinct tells us about our baby? I see so many mums (myself included at times) being swayed from what they feel is right by over-bearing advice from albeit well-meaning by-standers. WHY DO WE DO THIS TO OURSELVES? We know our babies better than anyone else – why don’t we trust ourselves more?

I personally have learnt first hand how important it is to trust your instincts and to listen to your own intuition, so I wanted to write this blog to encourage other mum’s (and dad’s) to listen to your own feelings about what is right for your child, rather than constantly seeking the advice (and maybe approval) of others. I’ve found that by going with the flow, listening to my own intuition and allowing Lilybelle freedom to develop her own routine, our days feel much more harmonious and flow relatively easily. That’s not to say we don’t have our moments! However I find the more relaxed I am around those moments, the easier they are to deal with. And on those days when nothing goes right, just repeat this - “All Is Well In My World!”


 I trusted my instincts that bubba was ready for solids, despite what many books and health profesionals say about waiting till a specific age. And boy does she love her din-dins!